Discuss Darlings

Come discuss with us! All honesty is honored and treasured.

Whether it be as a reader or as a blogger, we’ve probably all been through that awkward they-might-think-I’m-weird stage. When I first started interacting with the bookish community, I felt kind of scared, intimidated and shy to approach other bloggers and authors, but now I’m getting around to it, slowly but surely.

I’ve tweeted to a bunch of authors whose books I loved, and I’ve talked to fellow booknerds about all the bookish things!

Here are a few facts that might help you get out of your shell:

  • Don’t worry about leaving comments on blog posts–most bloggers will appreciate your comments and thoughts, whether you agreed with them or not.
  • Scared to tweet to your favorite authors? Worry not–some authors will favorite/retweet your tweets, and a handful will even reply to you personally! They love knowing that their books are being read.
  • You think replying to a bookworm’s tweet will be weird? Nah–most of us find it awesome that other readers want to try and get to know us! It feels awesome.
  • When you’re posting something–do you think it might offend someone? Relax! You’re probably just overthinking it. If you just want to share your opinion on a specific topic, go for it! Spread your arms wide for both agreements and disagreements coming your way. It’s normal. But still, make sure you’re not intentionally bashing someone/something.

Scared you might come off as creepy, stalker-y or rude? Here are a few tips:

  • When it’s your first time interacting with someone, keep it cool. Don’t get too personal at first–you can do that when you guys have talked more.
  • Relax. Be natural! No need for all that formal talk. Even the authors want you to be yourself.
  • Show your enthusiasm–but not to much. For example, you’re excited for something–one exclamation point is enough. More than two and you might come off as a bit scary (unless you and the person you’re talking to are both eager, which makes it totally not weird).
  • When stating your opinions, don’t bash others’. You have the right to your own opinions, and others have theirs.

So, are you ready to get out of your shell? Have you been out of it for forever? xD Any additional tips?

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About Aimee

Aimee loves being a little bookworm (okay–she doesn’t like being little). She also loves chocolates and sweets but is freaked out by the thought of possibly getting diabetes.

Goodreads | Twitter | Instagramall of Aimee’s posts →

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43 thoughts on “Getting Out of Your Shell

  1. I started my blog about six months ago. So only thing that I’m little concerned about is that totally there are only four comments. How was it for you at the beginning? :) and also how it with views now and then?

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    1. When I started out, I would get around one or two comments on some of my posts. After realizing that I need to reach out to other people, my stats have definitely increased. Good luck! :D

      PS, just checked out your blog! You’ll probably get more thoughts and comments if you post in English since more people will understand your posts. ^_^

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  2. Look at you, advisor to all of the awkward turtles out there. You need an Ask Aimee colum for bloggers ;)

    I agree with all this, seriously. It’s important to just kind of let loose and open yourself up. Worst case scenario: you get ignored. Big deal. ON TO THE NEXT. Staying social is the key thing with blogging, if you don’t network you’ll never make friends and you’ll never get your voice out there

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    1. *winks*

      Very true! I’ve come across a few people who never replied back to my comments/tweets/etc, and those cases sucked, but life is life! There are always other, friendlier people I can talk to in this community. :)

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    1. I’ve been blogging for a year and a half, and of course I still find it awkward to talk to some people, but for the most part I’ve discovered that interaction has tons of pros (networking, making friends, making opinions heard, etc.) :) Good luck, and thank you!

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  3. Haha great post! I was worried about the same things — coming off as weird. But, like you said, you have to put yourself out there and it’s best to start out light. I love how Twitter allows us to interact with other booknerds and even authors. It’s always such a thrill to get a tweet from an author you respect :)

    Kim @ YA Asylum

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    1. I used to think that Twitter was a bad replacement for Facebook, but now I use it a lot more than FB. ;) I love it when an author replies to me–I feel like I’ve met a celebrity. ;)

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  4. I’m giving the link to this post to my best friend. She’s just starting her new blog and wants to be more active in the community! :D

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  5. Fantastic post, Aimee! I was quite awkward when I first started talking to people in the community but now I’m MUCH more comfortable and I’ve made some great friends!

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    1. Thank you! I would be just be an awkward teenage girl if it weren’t for blogging. Well, I’m still an awkward teenage girl, but I’m an awkward teenage girl with some fabulous bookish friends!

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  6. Awww, this is a wonderful post^^ I think that at heart, most bookworms/bookish peeps are a bit introverted and awkward. I was never shy about commenting on blog posts when I was starting up BUT I was shy about tweeter other bloggers and authors..I’m still working on that bit, even now but I’ve gotten much better ;) Great advice here and thanks for stopping by earlier! New follower via Bloglovin ♥ :)

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    1. I think most people are more chill with comments since they aren’t making comments on personal things most of the time… But still, I would love to chat more with people on Twitter as well!

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  7. Great post! I was actually thinking last night about my thoughts and fears when entering the blogging community. It’s nice to see that many of my “newbie” thoughts were addressed in this post! :)

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  8. This is an super important post girl! I hope those that still feel a bit shy and awkward when it comes to blogging will read it and feel encouraged (: I definitely feel that seeing all of these big bloggers talking together and such can certainly be intimidating to the new blogger. They just need to relax and let conversation flow naturally though, which of course is easier said then done. Hopefully your post offers them comfort and solace.

    LOL, I still suck at using twitter to connect to fellow bloggers though. I either never know what to say, or want to say more than 140 characters. The twitter struggle is so real hahaha.

    Great post Aimee <33

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  9. I remember when I first started blogging, I was pretty shy and all the comments I left were really formal, haha XD And now I’m more comfortable with myself and the blogosphere my comments are pretty much JUST CAPSING AND FLAILING AND EXCESSIVE EXCITEMENT!!!!

    I’m glad you’re getting around your shyness, Aimee, because you are lovely to talk to! <3

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  10. I love this post! I’ve been blogging for 2 1/2 years and I’m just now trying to come out of my shell and try to make more bloggy friends. Actually, it was one of my goals for 2015 haha.

    I’m just a shy person by nature and I overanalyze everything, so it’s hard for me to break out and tweet someone, or reply to a random tweet that I see. I have made more of an effort but I still find myself hitting the reply button and then hitting delete before posting it. Hopefully I can eventually become more confident and end up making some great friends :)

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  11. Lovely tips, my dear! IRL I’m pretty quiet and shy but in the blogging world I’ve slowly learned to become more sociable. As a blogger, I learned it’s an important trait to have because you don’t want to isolate yourself from this amazing community.

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  12. I am terrible when it comes to interacting with people. Both online and in real life. I’m just so shy and anxious. It leads to me second guessing everything I say and worrying too much. It doens’t help that a couple of times I did try to reach out I was plain ignored :( These are great tips though I’m not sure my brain will let me follow them!

    I’ve found one of the best ways to get me out of my shell is fangirling about something I love. If I get into the conversation I stop worrying about what the other person might think of me and just share all my feelings! (Then afterwards wonder if I took the fangirling a little too far and scared the other person off…)

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  13. You’ve hit the nail on the spot, Aimee!! Honestly, I’m just up for conversation in general and I care not if it’s weird etc because you know, I’m not like the model of sanity or anything LOL My motto in life is to just go for it (mostly irl too, esp to strangers, I love having a quick chat when I’m shopping because seriously, I’m never going to meet those people again hahaha)

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  14. Very helpful tips, Aimee :* I’ve been blogging for about six months now (took a two month hiatus, ECK), and well, I shall use your awesome tips to ask you something.

    Aimee, will you be my best bloggy friend ever?

    Did I come off too strong? *I am not acting stalkerish; Aimee told me its OKAY, this isn’t stalkerish behavior*

    OH GOD WHAT IF IVE OFFENDED YOU? :O

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  15. Great post! Social media is just that – to be social. We expect people to chat us up, and blogs expect that others will comment. So in that kind of environment, it is so much easier to get out of one’s shell and interact, since people will not think you’re odd for it.

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  16. Hmm. Actually I have a question, as long as you don’t mind answering. I know you big bloggers must be super busy bees :P So here goes:
    I’ve noticed that a few special bloggers can become super popular in less than a year. What do you think they owe to their success?

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  17. This is SUCH an awesome post! I was so, so scared to interact for the first like, 6 months of blogging! I seriously wish I’d read a post like this, it would have given me a nice, gentle push to get out there! Honestly, if anyone is contemplating jumping in, DO IT! This community is so welcoming. You’ve basically nailed it Aimee! Great post :)

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  18. These are awesome tips, Aimee. I’m trying to be better about all these things, so this is helpful. It’s a good reminder that being me is fine and that being more social needn’t be as fear inducing as it used to be. :D

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  19. I still find it hard sometimes to interact on twitter especially with bloggers much “cooler” than me! It’s always awkward to find that groove but I love how quickly those relationships develop and how all of a sudden you’re squeeing over OTPs!

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  20. Hahahhaha I LOVE THIS POST. I think this was me in the beginning of last year too. BUT YES GOOD TIPS. Try not to be a stalker HAHAHA yes. But I definitely agree with the opinions part. Everyone has their own opinion and they’re allowed to express it!

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  21. I love this post! When I started blogging at the beginning of June, I was very hesitant to reach out, thinking I didn’t have anything to add to blog posts, or worried that people might not like me. But it’s a lot better now, and I really feel like I’m a part of the community. I can only recommend this to newbies (even though I do still feel a little bit like a newbie) – reach out! Comment! Engage! I’ve met so many awesome people here.

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  22. Great post! When I first started blogging (about six months ago!) I felt so awkward leaving comments, and it would take me ages trying to write the perfect one. Now I just say what my initial thoughts were on reading the post, spell check it (i’m prone to typos!) and press publish. I’m still pretty awkward on Twitter though, and feel kind of weird about actually tweeting people, but hopefully I’ll get better with that!

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  23. I feel like a lot of the stuff just reflects to life outside of the internet. You have to kind of put yourself out there if you want to build relationships. If you feel unconfident, do what most confident people do: fake it ’til you make it.

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  24. I love reading all these lovely comments and realising that I’m not alone in my awkwardness, haha ;) I’ve been blogging for two years now, but I still get a little weirded out when I think about commenting on popular bloggers’ posts – it feels so embarrassing still! Luckily, most of the time they’re absolutely lovely and I’m totally overthinking things (as usual!), so that’s always a relief ;) Great post! x

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  25. I HATE reaching out to people. It stresses me out no end. I especially hate it when I try and engage someone in a Twitter conversation and they just ignore me. Then I feel stupid. I try not to be so silly about it though and interact with other people anyway because that’s why we blog isn’t it?!

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  26. I completely agree with you! It’s such a lovely community and reaching out should be way less scary here than it is anywhere else. To be honest, I’ve never really put myself out there to anyone other than replying to a tweet or commenting on a post. I think it’s totally awesome to just tweet someone for the sake of it though. :D

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